Silent release of some illusive of thing

Smoke of sorts, vision distorts

Whispers, that faded when the lights dimmed 

The thong, the crimson,

That pretty thing. 

   So I go home, open my mail and find a a message from my ex, and of course I have no idea, how exactly i’m supposed to react to it. I mean it’s been around 7 months(?) since I last heard from her. So, what exactly do you do in such situations, do you get right back to it, act like the past 7 months didn’t happen, do you let all those bottled up feelings take over or do you act indifferent? I’m not sure exactly how I feel about this to begin with, at this point I have zero expectations. I am curious though…               Also, I just really needed to rant about something, anything really. 

I just got back home after what would seem like a rather uneventful day. After having spent the day roaming the streets with a camera, nicely hidden away inside the backpack slung on my back, desperately looking for something “interesting”, I finally gave up and decided that my perception has been clouded by this seemingly endless apathy for life that I’ve developed recently. What does one do exactly when previous ideas are lost and one finds themselves incapable of executing the simplest tasks? Ones which once came so simply. Yes, I lack conviction, like several others around me, I have therefore allowed myself to fall under that generalization that I try to avoid. I think I’m going to have to resort to “art” instead, hopefully the thoughts (mostly frustrated ones) will be able to take the desired shapes on paper, hopefully I will know what the desired shapes are.